The TueDo List: Our Abortion Stories + Peri Skincare + Angelyne
Plus: How to go grey without losing your sh**
STORY: My Abortion Story — Testimonials from Midlife
This week TueNight is sharing a special collection of stories from 11 women and their very personal decision.
As Gen-X women, our pregnancy years are, typically, a distant memory. We have the hindsight of the decision that some of us had to make many years ago (for many Black and Brown women, having a choice wasn’t always possible) and, as always in our 40s and beyond, the benefit of perspective.
We’ve been horrified at the pending SCOTUS decision on abortion and we know that sharing our own stories is one of the most powerful tools we have to normalize the experience.
Here, we share experiences from TueNight writers; some chose to use their names, others preferred to stay anonymous. You’ll find a diverse collection of women and scenarios: the moment wasn’t right, a life was at risk, a woman was raped, a woman decided not to have an abortion. As author Desiree Cooper says, “In the end, the only ‘good’ reason for a woman to have an abortion is that she wanted one.” We’ve included ages and locations where women felt comfortable to share, as well as the state where the abortion took place, linking to a useful map that shows what will happen in that state if Roe v. Wade falls.
We hope these stories encourage you to take action, perhaps share your own story with those you love, and/or give to an organization that’s meaningful to you — ideally a local organization. Here is a great list compiled by Alison Turkos to get you started.
These are beautiful and powerful stories. Read with care.
— Margit
THIS WEEK
📖 READ: There’s no such thing as a textbook menopause — and taking HRT isn’t “cheating.” Anita Hill says we need to take the long view on SCOTUS. How my fitness tracker turned me against myself. Seven things to know about Karine Jean-Pierre, the new White House press secretary. How to let your hair go gray without losing your mind. As an Asian American woman, I can't step outside without feeling terrified. F*** GRT; when so much is at stake, silence is no longer an option.
👀 LOOK: The video for Eurovision winners Kalush Orchestra’s “Stefania,” filmed in the Ukrainian war zone. Detroit area ladies, please go to this dream hampton exhibit and report back.
🎧 LISTEN: The 20 best sex, erotica, and relationship podcasts. The latest season of the BEING podcast, which calls itself “reality TV for your ears,” focuses on four trans people. Digging new music from Sharon Van Etten and Lizzo’s “It’s About Damn Time” featuring…Margit?
🤣 LOL: The latest fashion trend to return: Skants, aka “I’m wearing all my clothes today.” I lived it: I tried to listen to new music. There is a quarterback named General Booty and we have some questions for his parents. The Gen-X replies to David Gergen’s lazy tweet.
🛒 ADD TO CART: The best products for perimenopausal skin, according to dermatologists. AAPI books recommended by AAPI writers.
📺 WATCH
Thursday: Emmy Rossum stars in Angelyne. Says Rossum, “She’s as if Marilyn Monroe got into an Easy Bake Oven with an ’80s punk Barbie Doll and a dose of new age spirituality.” (Peacock)
Friday: The Dowager Duchess has a mysterious past in Downton Abbey: A New Era (theaters), Sissy Spacek and J.K. Simmons star in sci-fi series Night Sky (Prime), and George Carlin's American Dream, a two-part documentary about the comedian’s life and work (HBO).
Saturday: Natasha Lyonne hosts SNL. (NBC)
AMA: Omi Burney-Scott, Black Girls Guide to Menopause
Next Tuesday we’ll host our monthly “Ask Me Anything” with the amazing Omisade Burney-Scott, creator of Black Girl’s Guide to Surviving Menopause. You can ask her anything about menopause, her style, Durham, NC hotspots, where she got those glasses — literally anything. Our AMAs are casual affairs – we’ll be text chatting on The TueNight Social via an open thread, no video – so come as you are (glorious.) This is for TueNight Social members only so make sure to join!
TUENIGHT 10: Lorraine Candy
Age: 53.
Basic bio: Lorraine is the mother of four children ages 10-19, co-host of the UK podcast Postcards From Midlife, and bestselling author of “Mum What’s Wrong With You?” 101 Things Only Mothers of Teenage Girls Know. She is the former editor-in-chief of UK Elle, Cosmopolitan, and The Sunday Times Style, and an occasional columnist. She’s a dog lover, slow cold water swimmer, and art fan from Cornwall.
Beyond the bio: “There’s a revolution happening in the UK right now: Women are finally talking about menopause and perimenopause and I am so proud to have been part of this as the former editor of magazines Gen-X women read [in the UK]. I went mad at 47 as my hormones fluctuated and if I had known what was going on then my life at work and home would have been easier. Co-hosting our podcast helped me understand.”
What makes you a grown-ass lady? “Knowing that change is painful as we embrace our magnificent second acts, but I now know we CAN cope when life is overwhelming if we know why this transformation is happening. Knowledge is power for Gen-X women. When we unleash our power we are unstoppable.”
We’ll take your questions TueNighters!
Karine Jean-Pierre, Gen-Xer, behind the press podium.
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