The Quiet

It’s the last Tuesday for TueNight… for now.

(Photo: Stocksy)

Happy January TueNighters,

It’s me, Margit. Hope your 2024 is off to a peaceful and productive start and you’re hiding under the sheets only a few times a week. I just wanted to pop in here to explain what’s going on with this website and community that we all love so dearly — or, try to explain, because I’m not entirely sure myself. Back in October, I suggested in this post that TueNight as we know it would be coming to a close, after 10 great years. 

Since then, a few things have shifted for me. I feel a little like The Who, who said they would be playing their final concert in 1982 and then went on to play Live Aid in 1985 and several more times after that. You can’t keep a good band down.

And that’s how I feel about TueNight — we’re this large collective of people who (hopefully) aren’t going anywhere, but we can always find each other and it might be worth checking in once in a while.

My plan was — and still is — to work on a book/screenplay (it started as a book then became a screenplay and now it’s back to a book… are you sensing a deep character flaw?), and perhaps to pop in here from time to time. 

And then, life happened. In December, after time in the hospital and then hospice, my Mom passed away. It has been a surreal, devastating, traumatic and curious moment for me, a subject which I might go into in an essay down the road, but for now, I’ll just let it be. And that’s what I’m trying to do with everything right now — let it simmer, let it be. 

I’m still in the process of accepting that she’s not still a phone call away. 

Part of me wanted to run here and check in with you all: so many of us have lost parents, are caregiving for parents, who haven’t had parents for a long time. I didn’t because I was too overcome. I imagine you can understand.

So right now we’re in a pause. The Pause. How appropriate. Three months, six months — I’m not sure. BUT… I might sneak back in here from time to time to do some writing under the It’s Me, Margit banner. I’ve thought about moving entirely to another Substack but I haven’t the energy to think that through. 

Right now I’m just living in the quiet. The quiet of a dark, frigid January. The quiet of a mother drifting away forever. The quiet of listening to my own breath. The quiet of nothing to hit “send” on, Tuesday night at 8pm.

My plan, with my newfound time, is to write a LOT, do more reading — maybe I’ll even listen to podcasts (which I never do) — spend time with my 90-year-old Dad and my family, keep a close watch on my beagle Bo (who has a pretty serious nerve sheath tumor. When it rains…), and to just find joy in the stillness.

I’ve held off on writing this note to you all, because it’s so hard. What can I say except: Wait for me? I’ll be back, in some form, or amoeba-like shape, wanting to know what’s new, what’s hard, what’s good with all of you.  

In the meantime, here’s to your own creative pursuits, dreams, and life revamps. (We are all in the thick of that all the time, no matter our age, aren’t we?) 

Love you all.

Margit

And before you go…

I do still wonder what matters to you, what TueNight means to you, and could be for you in our future. So will you take a minute and fill out this survey? Because even as I’m stepping back, I still want to know what you think, what you need, what you love, and what you’re waiting for. Huge thanks. Xo