The TueDo List: Midlife Unfriend + Sweat Savior + We're Live Tonight!
Plus Julia Child, Tinder for cats and Margit's new favorite earworm...
📖 READ: Jamie Lee Curtis says enough already with the “anti-aging” talk. Hillary Clinton’s tribute to Madeleine Albright. How some Asian American women are fighting back. “I am a biracial immigrant with a Black Fijian mother who grew up (and still lives) in rural Nova Scotia. If that’s too complicated for someone to comprehend, then they’re not worth my time.” Let’s consider the benefits of menopause. Atlas Obscura‘s stories about women who have been left out of history books. Roxane Gay on #slapgate. Timely: Ten signs it’s time to break up with a friend.
🎧 LISTEN: Archetypes and Oprahdemics, new podcasts from Meghan Markle and Oprah, respectively. Margaret, our newsletter editor was inexplicably waking up with Brittney Spears’ “Toxic” stuck in her head every morning – until Margit recommended “Chaise Longue” by Wet Leg, a much better earworm.
🤣 LOL: Lady Gaga didn’t break up with Caitlin Jenner, she just “changed baristas.” Tinder for cats. Succession, but it’s Arrested Development. Amber Ruffin’s Oscars recap. Welcome to the museum of natural body hair.
Thursday: Julia, a new fictional series about Julia Child, looks fun. (HBO Max)
Friday: The Bubble, Judd Apatow’s “pandemic comedy,” with an all-star cast that includes Kate McKinnon. (Netflix)
TONIGHT: How to Break Up with Your Friends
Join us tonight as Margit chats with psychotherapist Erin Falconer about cultivating deep friendships, setting boundaries and, as the title implies, bidding adieu.
This event is free, but you’ll need to register in advance.
STORY: Friendship Breakups Don’t Get Any Easier in Our 50s
A few years ago, just as the pandemic started, I lost a really good friend. She didn’t die, but she might as well have. The grief was real.
Losing this friend was excruciatingly painful. She was a brilliant, hilariously quippy, and thoughtful friend. She and I met at a conference in our mid-40s and our rapport was instant. We spoke a certain effortless language that I didn’t really share with anyone else. As Erin Falconer notes in her book, How to Break Up With Your Friends: Finding Meaning, Connection, and Boundaries in Modern Friendships, “Every friendship is its own jigsaw puzzle. The way you fit together with one friend might look radically different from the way you fit with another…”
OBSESSED: A Gel That Solves My Sweat
Recently on Twitter, a colleague mentioned feeling sweaty at a conference, and I had to DM her immediately to let her know about one of my favorite helpers in my struggle against extreme head and facial sweat: Neat 3B Face Saver Gel. It's a clear, completely odorless product that comes from New Zealand – they understand humidity there.
For years, through perimenopause and in menopause and whatever we're in after that, I've relied on Neat 3B around and sometimes even in my hairline to stave off the sweats from hot flashes and antidepressant medications and social anxiety. Wheeeee, I'm a treat!
Just be sure to apply it on top of whatever else you use, whether you're a low-maintenance sunscreen-only type or a serum-moisturizer-foundation-concealer-type, otherwise, you may experience some minor flaking of your cosmetics. No need to get multiple, painful Botox injections in your scalp. It's easy to find Neat 3B, too, on any of your favorite shopping sites. You can thank me sometime by treating me to a very cold drink.
— Bethanne Patrick, @TheBookMaven
Did someone say second booster shot for over 50? Let’s get jabbed, TueNighters!