This is thoughtful and excellent, Margit! Thank you. I’m on Threads and am loving its sense of fun and promise--and/but am really trying to be mindful about how and when I pick up my phone. So appreciate your sharing where you’re at. (And can one of those upcoming leisurely lunches please be with me?)
I needed this inspiration, thank you. I am going to start charging my phone in the living room which will keep me from doom-scrolling (I know from experience but went back to the dark side because I’m an addict)
I just deleted Words With Friends, my drug of choice. Social media apps are in a TW☠️ (Trigger Warning) folder in the last screen.
A difficult thing for me is that many close friends are scattered all over the place and we tend to have massive text conversations. I wind up being tethered to my phone more than I would like.
I love my phone, I need my phone, but I so deperately long for the 1990’s when I had more time to think, dream, live, and feel present.
I've been on a social media sabbatical. I went through several years of being on social media a lot, then one summer I went on vacation, which was a natural way for me to stop, and on my return realized how nice it was NOT to feel a compulsion to post the next thing. I never really went back to it in the same way. Something about my relationship to it changed and now I find it a chore more often than not - rather than fun, which I used to. I know I'm not up on stuff, but I spend so much time on screens as it is just doing my regular work. I don't want my whole life to disappear into a screen.
Only thing I can think of is missing out on things. But it was as if once I was unhooked - and the scrolling spell was broken - I didn't mind missing out.
Events! Not everyone advertises their events on IG. That’s the only social app I follow. I allow myself 5 minutes on my FB wall to find events happening. Yes I time it.
I’ve been on a social media sabbatical since 2015. I realized it was consuming me in a way I didn’t like and wanted to take back the control in my life. I honestly have to say it has truly been liberating and I don’t find that I miss any of it one bit! In the beginning, I found myself with the urge to want to check my accounts but I stopped myself from doing that. That’s when I really noticed how it all had such an addicting affect on me. Realizing that just made it easier to stay away.
I have taken breaks before. What I think you'll feel, Margit, is good! It's a relief. Yes, I'm on Threads with the overly optimistic hope of driving Insta people here (didn't have much luck from Insta itself). But turning off notifications, and adding a delightfully relaxing tone for phone calls (yes, I'm of the generation who still talks), texts and emails (can't escape work) is also key. I purposely chose alerts I found soothing rather than ones that struck panic/stress/a Pavlovian response. Enjoy your break! xo
I’d just like for friends to start calling for phone visits again. I miss them. Even friends my age don’t call anymore for a phone visit. They fucking text. I hate texting. It takes forever, voice to text always screws up and tonation isn’t possible to express yourself properly... which brings me to an old joke by Uncle Buddy who used to tell me this joke when I was a kid.
It’s really corny but it proves my theory with the texting.
A local Tailor put up a sign that read “What do you think? my Name is Fink I’ll press your pants for Nothing!
So all these customers got their pants pressed but when they came in to pickup their pants. They all started to leave without paying.
Mr Fink said, Hold on, where’s my money? They all responded, “But the sign said….
Of course with tonation the sign reads completely different.
Mr Fink says no no no you read it all wrong!
If you put the exaggeration on Nothing as a question it’s a different sentence. Ok I’m done with my Borscht belt jokes.
I'm a terrible phone caller, but when I have a long, luxurious call with a friend it can be bliss. I'm a frequent texter but VERY often mess up the intention or tone is misconstrued. I'm going to use the phone more often in these next few months and see how that goes.
I deleted Fb, Twitter, LinkedIn and tiktok over 4 years ago. I don’t allow notifications from any social apps just business email is allowed. Even my text messages are on vibration only. I put my phone on focus which allows me to set times my phone will ring. IG will no longer let me post simultaneoulsy to my biz FB page, so I'll go on the FB biz suite and literally time myself to 5minutes in case I start scrolling on my personal wall.
I’ve never been a big twitter fan and TikTok is just silly and thirsty to me IMHO.
I like IG because I am an artist besides being a biz owner. So pictures are purrfect for me batman.
My one remaining game app I can’t kick is playing Royal Match before bed.
I used to keep my phone charging in another room for several years about 7 years ago.
I recommend reading “Stolen Focus” by Johann Hari.
Read Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport in January and went on a 30-day Digital Detox (NO social media at all)...it was really hard for 7 days, and then it just wasn't. I was on Day 33 when I realized my month had ended and I hadn't even noticed.
Since then, I still dip into IG most days, but have my timer set to 15 mins so I don't get stuck too long (and I do hit "Ignore for 15 more minutes" like a trained monkey so don't saint me.) FB only to make sure my MIL is still alive and posting ;) Twitter once a week, maybe. So when the Threads announcement was made I thought "meh." I'm here in non-Threads land to tell you - it's just fine.
Good luck! It's really worth it. (I just finished reading my 25th book this year.)
I tried One Sec and didn’t like it. Seems like I’d have to subscribe to fine tune it for it to be a bit better, and I didn’t feel like I needed it, because...
Personally I love being able to do work from anywhere from this tiny little handheld device. I don’t want to be forced to go sit at a desk or have my laptop everywhere to be productive.
However, wasting time (vs actually being productive) is a whole other matter... hence Opal’s helpful limits that snap me out of my IG wormholes. 🤭
Found this wise piece through the Gloria NL and am applauding loudly. I cold turkey quit Instagram in April and while I do miss it, everything in my life has improved, most notably my memory (I'm 32) and my ability to sit with my own thoughts. Enormous relief. Admittedly I really miss keeping up and having great DM conversations. But it wasn't worth it. I didn't want to spend any more of my kids' childhood scrolling.
That quote about switching sapping your creativity...that's an eye-opener for me. I spend way too much time with my phone in my hand, but more time texting friends and using non-social productivity apps like banking, meditation, etc. At least I think. Even if I don't delete my apps, I might impose more "dark" hours away from my phone: I have a pinched nerve in my neck that could be "tech neck".
yup! It started way back when, when my chef hubby's only day off was Wednesday. We accidentally left our wrist watches at home, and LOVED the day, became "no watch Wednesdays". Turned into "no-watch every day". Wasn't long later when we "accidentally" left our phones at home for our weekly outings around town. WHAT A DAY! We've been practicing most of what you recommend for years now. Just last week, my best friend and I went to a concert, as we were pulling out of her driveway, she said "wait! I left my phone inside". I said, "so sad, so bad." She agreed to leave it behind all night, and said it was the best night EVER! Even though she doesn't check the phone when with friends, just knowing it's in her back pocket calling her name, waiting to be privately whipped out and scrolled through can be irksome. She ended the evening feeling quite "FREE". (btw - we texted her husband and let him know in case of emergency, that I did have my phone).
10000000%. I'm so with you dear Margit. Let's enjoy life OFF our screens.
I am downloading One Sec immediately!
This is thoughtful and excellent, Margit! Thank you. I’m on Threads and am loving its sense of fun and promise--and/but am really trying to be mindful about how and when I pick up my phone. So appreciate your sharing where you’re at. (And can one of those upcoming leisurely lunches please be with me?)
My social media use has definitely ramped up over the last year and I needed this nudge to reign it in. It's so easy to fall into.
Also, if anyone wants to join me on this detox let me know - we can do a little check in with each other on how it's going!
just commented and I’m in.
I needed this inspiration, thank you. I am going to start charging my phone in the living room which will keep me from doom-scrolling (I know from experience but went back to the dark side because I’m an addict)
I just deleted Words With Friends, my drug of choice. Social media apps are in a TW☠️ (Trigger Warning) folder in the last screen.
A difficult thing for me is that many close friends are scattered all over the place and we tend to have massive text conversations. I wind up being tethered to my phone more than I would like.
I love my phone, I need my phone, but I so deperately long for the 1990’s when I had more time to think, dream, live, and feel present.
Same same same. Oh Words With Friends.... I forgot about that... no!!!! :-)
I've been on a social media sabbatical. I went through several years of being on social media a lot, then one summer I went on vacation, which was a natural way for me to stop, and on my return realized how nice it was NOT to feel a compulsion to post the next thing. I never really went back to it in the same way. Something about my relationship to it changed and now I find it a chore more often than not - rather than fun, which I used to. I know I'm not up on stuff, but I spend so much time on screens as it is just doing my regular work. I don't want my whole life to disappear into a screen.
Curious, any downsides to the sabbatical?
Only thing I can think of is missing out on things. But it was as if once I was unhooked - and the scrolling spell was broken - I didn't mind missing out.
Events! Not everyone advertises their events on IG. That’s the only social app I follow. I allow myself 5 minutes on my FB wall to find events happening. Yes I time it.
I’ve been on a social media sabbatical since 2015. I realized it was consuming me in a way I didn’t like and wanted to take back the control in my life. I honestly have to say it has truly been liberating and I don’t find that I miss any of it one bit! In the beginning, I found myself with the urge to want to check my accounts but I stopped myself from doing that. That’s when I really noticed how it all had such an addicting affect on me. Realizing that just made it easier to stay away.
I have taken breaks before. What I think you'll feel, Margit, is good! It's a relief. Yes, I'm on Threads with the overly optimistic hope of driving Insta people here (didn't have much luck from Insta itself). But turning off notifications, and adding a delightfully relaxing tone for phone calls (yes, I'm of the generation who still talks), texts and emails (can't escape work) is also key. I purposely chose alerts I found soothing rather than ones that struck panic/stress/a Pavlovian response. Enjoy your break! xo
I love your idea about a relaxing tone for phone calls.
It was a game-changer for me. xo
I’d just like for friends to start calling for phone visits again. I miss them. Even friends my age don’t call anymore for a phone visit. They fucking text. I hate texting. It takes forever, voice to text always screws up and tonation isn’t possible to express yourself properly... which brings me to an old joke by Uncle Buddy who used to tell me this joke when I was a kid.
It’s really corny but it proves my theory with the texting.
A local Tailor put up a sign that read “What do you think? my Name is Fink I’ll press your pants for Nothing!
So all these customers got their pants pressed but when they came in to pickup their pants. They all started to leave without paying.
Mr Fink said, Hold on, where’s my money? They all responded, “But the sign said….
Of course with tonation the sign reads completely different.
Mr Fink says no no no you read it all wrong!
If you put the exaggeration on Nothing as a question it’s a different sentence. Ok I’m done with my Borscht belt jokes.
I'm a terrible phone caller, but when I have a long, luxurious call with a friend it can be bliss. I'm a frequent texter but VERY often mess up the intention or tone is misconstrued. I'm going to use the phone more often in these next few months and see how that goes.
I deleted Fb, Twitter, LinkedIn and tiktok over 4 years ago. I don’t allow notifications from any social apps just business email is allowed. Even my text messages are on vibration only. I put my phone on focus which allows me to set times my phone will ring. IG will no longer let me post simultaneoulsy to my biz FB page, so I'll go on the FB biz suite and literally time myself to 5minutes in case I start scrolling on my personal wall.
I’ve never been a big twitter fan and TikTok is just silly and thirsty to me IMHO.
I like IG because I am an artist besides being a biz owner. So pictures are purrfect for me batman.
My one remaining game app I can’t kick is playing Royal Match before bed.
I used to keep my phone charging in another room for several years about 7 years ago.
I recommend reading “Stolen Focus” by Johann Hari.
Thanks Shaz for these details! So helpful
Read Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport in January and went on a 30-day Digital Detox (NO social media at all)...it was really hard for 7 days, and then it just wasn't. I was on Day 33 when I realized my month had ended and I hadn't even noticed.
Since then, I still dip into IG most days, but have my timer set to 15 mins so I don't get stuck too long (and I do hit "Ignore for 15 more minutes" like a trained monkey so don't saint me.) FB only to make sure my MIL is still alive and posting ;) Twitter once a week, maybe. So when the Threads announcement was made I thought "meh." I'm here in non-Threads land to tell you - it's just fine.
Good luck! It's really worth it. (I just finished reading my 25th book this year.)
Great case study Nancy. And how you kept things going after the detox. (I wondered about that part...)
I tried One Sec and didn’t like it. Seems like I’d have to subscribe to fine tune it for it to be a bit better, and I didn’t feel like I needed it, because...
I love the Opal app!! It really helps keep my usage in check: https://apps.apple.com/app/id1497465230
Everything in moderation, even moderation. 😉
Personally I love being able to do work from anywhere from this tiny little handheld device. I don’t want to be forced to go sit at a desk or have my laptop everywhere to be productive.
However, wasting time (vs actually being productive) is a whole other matter... hence Opal’s helpful limits that snap me out of my IG wormholes. 🤭
Thanks for another option Willo!
I’ve managed to pull back from social media or else I would never get anything done!! We survived without it in the past!! You can do it!!
Found this wise piece through the Gloria NL and am applauding loudly. I cold turkey quit Instagram in April and while I do miss it, everything in my life has improved, most notably my memory (I'm 32) and my ability to sit with my own thoughts. Enormous relief. Admittedly I really miss keeping up and having great DM conversations. But it wasn't worth it. I didn't want to spend any more of my kids' childhood scrolling.
Thank you Alex! I'm already feeling the same way. It's enlightening...
That quote about switching sapping your creativity...that's an eye-opener for me. I spend way too much time with my phone in my hand, but more time texting friends and using non-social productivity apps like banking, meditation, etc. At least I think. Even if I don't delete my apps, I might impose more "dark" hours away from my phone: I have a pinched nerve in my neck that could be "tech neck".
yup! It started way back when, when my chef hubby's only day off was Wednesday. We accidentally left our wrist watches at home, and LOVED the day, became "no watch Wednesdays". Turned into "no-watch every day". Wasn't long later when we "accidentally" left our phones at home for our weekly outings around town. WHAT A DAY! We've been practicing most of what you recommend for years now. Just last week, my best friend and I went to a concert, as we were pulling out of her driveway, she said "wait! I left my phone inside". I said, "so sad, so bad." She agreed to leave it behind all night, and said it was the best night EVER! Even though she doesn't check the phone when with friends, just knowing it's in her back pocket calling her name, waiting to be privately whipped out and scrolled through can be irksome. She ended the evening feeling quite "FREE". (btw - we texted her husband and let him know in case of emergency, that I did have my phone).