Is anyone else ready to take on some solo adventures this travel season?
As the weather warms up here in Jersey, I can't wait to explore new cities, hit the beach, and take in some stunning hikes. There's something truly liberating about embarking on a journey all by yourself — and I feel lucky to have a partner who supports my independent spirit.
So, what about you?
Do you take lots of solo trips? Has it become more difficult in midlife, or easier? Does it scare you? Do you revel in it? Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!
I love to travel by myself. While it's nice to have company sometimes, traveling by myself allows me to do exactly "what" I want, "when" I want and "if" I want.
I'm retiring in the next few months and after I move and get settled, I'm looking forward to seeing what retirement has to offer.
I’m curious, too, if people feel like traveling solo in midlife has become easier or harder - and why?
It’s probably the effects of the pandemic, but I took a solo trip to do some writing recently to a small place in upstate NY and I had both a wonderful time and slightly uneasy time. I typically love solo trips, for all the reasons Gayla mentioned, and was taken aback by how timid I felt. It’s not even like I was in another country (or another state!) but I just felt like it was harder to walk out the door to explore. Of course I did, eventually, (in the rain!),and found a cute coffee shop to sit with my thoughts for a bit. I’m still trying to figure out why I felt this way!
I’ve definitely felt this shift post-Pandemic. I’m always a bit anxious travelling alone but these feelings have increased. I’m heading to Thailand to meet up with friends in a couple weeks and am pushing through...
Timid! That's the word I was looking for! I have felt nervous before, while traveling, inexperienced, but this, this was a new feeling (at the beginning of perimenopause.) I felt timid and vulnerable and scared by pretty much anything new, or even just outside of my house. I didn't know where it came from either, but my whole life felt like that. Now, after learning a lot about hormones and the amazing things they do to (and for) our bodies and minds, I am chalking it up to the perimenopause and the transition, and I am shifting the way I travel, watching out for myself more, really taking into account what it is that I need.
Absolutely love that you made it out in the rain AND found a coffee shop! My favorite places to find when traveling, thank you for posting and starting this conversation!
I've done a lot of solo traveling, mostly back in my 20's-early 30's. It's exhilarating and terrifying all at the same time. I found that what worked best was to stay in youth hostels so that it was very easy to meet people, informal groups would naturally form, we'd travel together for a few days, then go our own ways. I'm not sure as an adult how that would work for me now? I've never been a fan of group travel, but I'm actually leading a group Food, Wine and Adventure trip to Portugal in October. Almost everyone who's joined so far is over 40, some almost 80! If you're interested you can read my Substack The Chefsmartypants Academy and message me there!
Yes! The time to think and absorb the experience without having to constantly socialize or consider someone else's travel experience is the biggest plus for me.
I have travelled solo for work quite a bit but in December 2019, I travelled to the Christmas markets of Prague, Vienna and Saltzburg solo and had the best time. I did what I wanted, when I wanted and how I wanted... I ate chocolate cake for dinner, spent 3 hours in one museum, walked everywhere etc. It was so liberating to not have to take anyone else into consideration for anything, not have to play mediator, not have to compromise etc. I realized how exhausted I was after putting so many people's needs and wants ahead of mine . I am way overdue and cannot wait to do it again!
I really love solo travel, and I've found that the things I love about it have gotten even more important to me the older I get. Having my own space in a hotel, eating what I want when I want it, following my own whims and my own schedule... I want it all, and I value it all, more and more.
Weirdly, at the same time, as I move into middle age and having lived through early pandemic lockdowns, I am also somehow even more of a homebody...? I miss my partner when I travel a lot more than I used to. And I also miss my home routine more these days (e.g. I love to eat, and when I travel, exploring new food and lots of it is a big part of my plans. But then I really look forward to getting back to my usual food routine, especially since my digestion isn't running quite as flawlessly as it used to.).
I chalk both these things up to becoming more and more attuned to what I love, and better at arranging my life so that I get more of what I love. I love home and routine, and I love travel and adventure, and I am so happy that I can have both in my life.
I do seasonal work and travel and I've just gotten to the point, where I need my own space and to go according to my own schedule. I'm also not bunking in a hostel or dorm anymore.
Several people have told me recently that I am being called to have a home base and it is starting to sound really good. My own food, when I need it, all the gosh darn supplements, my routine, my self care.
I also think that's why I like slow travel, and even more so now, I want to be in a place, not rushing around checking things off a list.
I love what you said - "becoming more and more attuned to what I love, and better at arranging my life so that I get more of what I love. I love home and routine, and I love travel and adventure, and I am so happy that I can have both in my life." Just so perfectly worded, and such a good reminder! Thank you! <3
Absolute solo travel here. Most of the trips I’ve taken have been solo. I’m going to New Zealand and Australia for 3 weeks for the Women’s World Cup in August.
I love solo travel and have actually been a traveling seasonal server for the past eight years, so I also move to a new state every few months, sometimes longer, (outside of O'ahu where I resided for a couple of years.) Then, I travel in between seasons. I guess you could say that I am a slomad. I prefer this, especially at this time in my life. My first trip abroad solo was Thailand. I love wandering and following my own intuition and finding that travel magic, meeting new souls, eating what I want, or even staying in when I want. HOWEVER, currently in perimenopause, and prior to hrt, I lost all interest and even cancelled a long-awaited trip to Tenerife because it just felt so very overwhelming and crushing and I could not summon the joy. I tried taking a short flight within Mass last year and experienced a full blown panic attack before the flight that I had never experienced prior. It was the first time in my life that I wanted to travel, just so I could stay in a resort in an inexpensive country or on an island somewhere and not have to speak to anyone.
Started hrt and felt somewhat like myself again, I was able to work a season on Martha's Vineyard and schedule and complete a trip to South Africa (albeit with a relative), then move to CA to find work. I am able to see the light of travel again and I am excited about that. There is an actual fear, as well as insecurity, and trepidation at times that I had not felt so acutely before. Before it was scary and exciting and exhilarating, now it just seemed terrifying! Before hrt, I could scarcely remember the feeling of traveling so freely, or the person I was in order to actually accomplish all that travel. I am hoping once I have made the transition into menopause, the hormones (or lack thereof) will be stable and I will find my joy and curiosity again, there are still so many places I want to see! So many places to go!
Also, did not find work in California, so I am looking for my next seasonal place. Although I actually found several people suggesting I should settle down for a second, create some roots, and then travel from there. This is intriguing to me, as I know there are other ways to travel. I might like the idea of having a home base and then finding new ways to travel (tour guide, anyone?,) but where to settle??? How to shift or transition?
Thank you for this conversation, I love talking about travel and hearing others' experiences, especially those in a similar boat! :)
This is amazing, Cb. I love the idea of a “slomad” lifestyle. I’m excited for your finding your next seasonal home and hope you let us know where you land so we can follow along. Do you keep an online journal? Personally, I would love to chance to live vicariously thru your adventures.
Unfor'unately, I do not. This is one of these things people always suggested to me, to write or keep up on the socials, I could never do it consistently, now I feel it's too late. I'll share with anyone who's interested though, thank you!! :D So, as for the next season, I did a weird thing. I applied to the Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport on a whim and was hired on the spot, so we'll see what happens next. Definitely a weird time to be back in Phx (I raised my sons here!)
It's not solo travel, but maybe a nice complement to it? Traveling with a group of like-minded (mostly) women in their second half of life, eating, drinking, hiking, etc. I'd love to meet some of your readers and share this experience.
I love to travel by myself. While it's nice to have company sometimes, traveling by myself allows me to do exactly "what" I want, "when" I want and "if" I want.
I'm retiring in the next few months and after I move and get settled, I'm looking forward to seeing what retirement has to offer.
I’m curious, too, if people feel like traveling solo in midlife has become easier or harder - and why?
It’s probably the effects of the pandemic, but I took a solo trip to do some writing recently to a small place in upstate NY and I had both a wonderful time and slightly uneasy time. I typically love solo trips, for all the reasons Gayla mentioned, and was taken aback by how timid I felt. It’s not even like I was in another country (or another state!) but I just felt like it was harder to walk out the door to explore. Of course I did, eventually, (in the rain!),and found a cute coffee shop to sit with my thoughts for a bit. I’m still trying to figure out why I felt this way!
I’ve definitely felt this shift post-Pandemic. I’m always a bit anxious travelling alone but these feelings have increased. I’m heading to Thailand to meet up with friends in a couple weeks and am pushing through...
Thanks for sharing that Dowie. I'll be sending you good vibes for Thailand (sounds exciting!)
Timid! That's the word I was looking for! I have felt nervous before, while traveling, inexperienced, but this, this was a new feeling (at the beginning of perimenopause.) I felt timid and vulnerable and scared by pretty much anything new, or even just outside of my house. I didn't know where it came from either, but my whole life felt like that. Now, after learning a lot about hormones and the amazing things they do to (and for) our bodies and minds, I am chalking it up to the perimenopause and the transition, and I am shifting the way I travel, watching out for myself more, really taking into account what it is that I need.
Absolutely love that you made it out in the rain AND found a coffee shop! My favorite places to find when traveling, thank you for posting and starting this conversation!
We live in Northern NY and own a coffee shop/bakery/cafe in a small town … so now I’m curious if you were nearby … doubtful, of course.
ERICA WIDES
5 min ago
I've done a lot of solo traveling, mostly back in my 20's-early 30's. It's exhilarating and terrifying all at the same time. I found that what worked best was to stay in youth hostels so that it was very easy to meet people, informal groups would naturally form, we'd travel together for a few days, then go our own ways. I'm not sure as an adult how that would work for me now? I've never been a fan of group travel, but I'm actually leading a group Food, Wine and Adventure trip to Portugal in October. Almost everyone who's joined so far is over 40, some almost 80! If you're interested you can read my Substack The Chefsmartypants Academy and message me there!
Ironically, I find myself traveling solo more now than I did in my twenties. Love the name of your Substack and thanks for sharing, Erica!
Interested!! Tour guiding was suggested to me as a way to transition my traveling, super curious! Plus, Food and Portugal? I have to read it! :)
I love getting away by myself. I get the big hotel bed to myself, can see what I want to see, and have the quiet to think and write about it.
And as many danged pillows as we want, love it!
SAME. There's really nothing better.
Yes! The time to think and absorb the experience without having to constantly socialize or consider someone else's travel experience is the biggest plus for me.
I have travelled solo for work quite a bit but in December 2019, I travelled to the Christmas markets of Prague, Vienna and Saltzburg solo and had the best time. I did what I wanted, when I wanted and how I wanted... I ate chocolate cake for dinner, spent 3 hours in one museum, walked everywhere etc. It was so liberating to not have to take anyone else into consideration for anything, not have to play mediator, not have to compromise etc. I realized how exhausted I was after putting so many people's needs and wants ahead of mine . I am way overdue and cannot wait to do it again!
Same, traveled for work dozens of times over the years but not so much for pleasure... until I turned 50 and was like what/who am I waiting for?!?!
Didn't embrace solo travel until I hit my 50s, but so far have gone on adventures including Bali, French Polynesia, South Africa and Antarctica!
You're my travel idol.
Come to Greece!
I really love solo travel, and I've found that the things I love about it have gotten even more important to me the older I get. Having my own space in a hotel, eating what I want when I want it, following my own whims and my own schedule... I want it all, and I value it all, more and more.
Weirdly, at the same time, as I move into middle age and having lived through early pandemic lockdowns, I am also somehow even more of a homebody...? I miss my partner when I travel a lot more than I used to. And I also miss my home routine more these days (e.g. I love to eat, and when I travel, exploring new food and lots of it is a big part of my plans. But then I really look forward to getting back to my usual food routine, especially since my digestion isn't running quite as flawlessly as it used to.).
I chalk both these things up to becoming more and more attuned to what I love, and better at arranging my life so that I get more of what I love. I love home and routine, and I love travel and adventure, and I am so happy that I can have both in my life.
Same!!
I do seasonal work and travel and I've just gotten to the point, where I need my own space and to go according to my own schedule. I'm also not bunking in a hostel or dorm anymore.
Several people have told me recently that I am being called to have a home base and it is starting to sound really good. My own food, when I need it, all the gosh darn supplements, my routine, my self care.
I also think that's why I like slow travel, and even more so now, I want to be in a place, not rushing around checking things off a list.
I love what you said - "becoming more and more attuned to what I love, and better at arranging my life so that I get more of what I love. I love home and routine, and I love travel and adventure, and I am so happy that I can have both in my life." Just so perfectly worded, and such a good reminder! Thank you! <3
Absolute solo travel here. Most of the trips I’ve taken have been solo. I’m going to New Zealand and Australia for 3 weeks for the Women’s World Cup in August.
Whoa, soooo cool!
I love solo travel and have actually been a traveling seasonal server for the past eight years, so I also move to a new state every few months, sometimes longer, (outside of O'ahu where I resided for a couple of years.) Then, I travel in between seasons. I guess you could say that I am a slomad. I prefer this, especially at this time in my life. My first trip abroad solo was Thailand. I love wandering and following my own intuition and finding that travel magic, meeting new souls, eating what I want, or even staying in when I want. HOWEVER, currently in perimenopause, and prior to hrt, I lost all interest and even cancelled a long-awaited trip to Tenerife because it just felt so very overwhelming and crushing and I could not summon the joy. I tried taking a short flight within Mass last year and experienced a full blown panic attack before the flight that I had never experienced prior. It was the first time in my life that I wanted to travel, just so I could stay in a resort in an inexpensive country or on an island somewhere and not have to speak to anyone.
Started hrt and felt somewhat like myself again, I was able to work a season on Martha's Vineyard and schedule and complete a trip to South Africa (albeit with a relative), then move to CA to find work. I am able to see the light of travel again and I am excited about that. There is an actual fear, as well as insecurity, and trepidation at times that I had not felt so acutely before. Before it was scary and exciting and exhilarating, now it just seemed terrifying! Before hrt, I could scarcely remember the feeling of traveling so freely, or the person I was in order to actually accomplish all that travel. I am hoping once I have made the transition into menopause, the hormones (or lack thereof) will be stable and I will find my joy and curiosity again, there are still so many places I want to see! So many places to go!
Also, did not find work in California, so I am looking for my next seasonal place. Although I actually found several people suggesting I should settle down for a second, create some roots, and then travel from there. This is intriguing to me, as I know there are other ways to travel. I might like the idea of having a home base and then finding new ways to travel (tour guide, anyone?,) but where to settle??? How to shift or transition?
Thank you for this conversation, I love talking about travel and hearing others' experiences, especially those in a similar boat! :)
This is amazing, Cb. I love the idea of a “slomad” lifestyle. I’m excited for your finding your next seasonal home and hope you let us know where you land so we can follow along. Do you keep an online journal? Personally, I would love to chance to live vicariously thru your adventures.
Unfor'unately, I do not. This is one of these things people always suggested to me, to write or keep up on the socials, I could never do it consistently, now I feel it's too late. I'll share with anyone who's interested though, thank you!! :D So, as for the next season, I did a weird thing. I applied to the Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport on a whim and was hired on the spot, so we'll see what happens next. Definitely a weird time to be back in Phx (I raised my sons here!)
Here's the trip link:https://trovatrip.com/trip/europe/portugal/portugal-with-erica-wides-oct-2023
Thank you!!
It's not solo travel, but maybe a nice complement to it? Traveling with a group of like-minded (mostly) women in their second half of life, eating, drinking, hiking, etc. I'd love to meet some of your readers and share this experience.
I think exploring a city or area with a guide is definitely solo travel 101.